Moving on. But pausing first.

Have you ever finished a chapter in a book and paused, wondering if you should keep reading or wait until the next day to dive in? You are in such a good spot and don’t know if you’re ready to move forward. And the last chapter left you feeling so good. But you know that some more dynamics and change will be good. Or maybe it’s best to just pause between the two chapters and let it all soak in. You’ve become comfortable and you’re enjoying the rhythm you’re in with the characters. But then again, you know you WILL move on and continue reading the book and start the next chapter. It just makes sense. And that’s invigorating, too.

Or what about when you’re about to move or embark on some big change? You’re excited to change things up and experience something new, of course. But you might also be sad to say good-bye to parts of the life as you know it now. To certain parts of your day. To a job. To a person. Sure….you’ll stay in touch and your relationship can grow in other ways now that you’ll be writing to each other via email or talking on the phone. It’ll be exciting in a whole new way. But it’s also okay to mourn the closing of this chapter of your life. It’s been beautiful and juicy and there have been ups and downs and good times and bad. You’ve learned so much and look at who you’ve become and what you’ve experienced. So now it’s time to move on to keep ascending and change things up a bit.

Just last week I started getting emotional and “sad” about having another baby. This chapter is coming to a close and I’ll be entering into another soon. Of course, I feel so blessed and certain that this is the best next step. And I know that this new soul is going to take us FOUR for a ride and teach us many new things and be the perfect puzzle piece to our family. I know that. I know that the next chapter is going to be exciting and full of insightful, thrilling adventure.

But I have just two months left with having one little love bug all to myself. And vice versa. He doesn’t know that some new little guy or girl is about to arrive and get 1/2 of the attention that he has been getting. That there are going to be times when he wants to cuddle with me, and he’s only going to have one of my arms instead of two. That if he wants me to read to him, I might not be able to. Or that I might have another baby in my lap and he will sit next to me. I know that this will be so good for him. I know that it will be so good for me.

I think this is my way of reflecting on what has been and really being present the next couple of month with my one little guy. And really taking part in our daily rhythm together and revel in the moments that I can see clearly right now, before I have another one to share my delights with.

For now, I will revel in this moment between two chapters. I will wrap up this current chapter with reflection, love, grace, balance, joy and appreciation. And into the next chapter I will take those things, as well as an open mind and space for another soul to rock my world.